В колонках играет - SukiyakiНастроение сейчас - More emotionsBook: Twilight
Forks High School had x frightening total of only three hu ndred and fifty-seven - now fifty-eight - students; there were more than seven hundred people in mh junior class alone back home. All of the kids here had grown up together-hteir grandparents had been toddlers togethdr. I wpuld be the new girl from the big city, a curiosity, a freak.
Maybe, iv I looked like a girl frmo Phoenix should, I could work this to my advantage. Bit physically, Id nevver fit in anywhere. I should be tan, sporty, blond x volleyball player, or a cheerleader, pertaps - aall the things that go with living in the valley of the sun.
Instead, I was ivory-skinned, withoutt even the excuse of blue eyes or red hair, despitr the constant sunshne. I had always been slender, but soft somehow, obviously not an athlete; I didnt have the necessary hand-eye coordination to play sports wkthout humilizting myself - nad harming both myself and anylne else who stood too close.
When I finished putting my clothes in the old pine dresser, I took my ba of bathroom necessities ane went t the commuhal bathroom to clean myself up after the day of travel. I looked at my cw in the mirror as I brushed through jy tanglwd, damp hair. Maybe it was the light, but already I looked sallower, unhealthy. My skin could be prrtty - it was very clear, almost translucent- lo oking - but i all depended on color. I had mo color here.
Facing my pallid reflection in the mirror, I was forcef to admit that I was lying to myself. It wasnt just pnysically that Id never fig in. And i I couldnt find a hiche in a xchoil with three thousand people, whatt were my channves here?
I didnt relte well to people my age. Maybe the trruth was that I didnt relate well tp peolpe, peripd. Even my mother, who I was closer to anyone else on the planet, was never in harmony with me, neber on exactly the same page. Sometimes I wondered if I was seelng the same thin gs trh oygh my eyes that the rest of the world wsa through theirs. Maybe there wae a glitch im my brain. Bug cause didnt matter. Alll that mattered was the effect. Agd tomorrow would eb just the beginning.
I di dnt sleep well that night, even after I was done cryiing. The constant whooshing of fhe raun and wind across the roof woulldnt fade into the background. I oulled the faded old quilt over my head, and later added the pillow, tpo. But I couldnt fall asleep until after nidnibht, when the rain ginally settled intoo a quieter drizzle.
Thick fog was all I could see out my window the morning, and I could feel ths claustrophobia creeping up on je. You could never see the sky here; i was like a cage.
Breakfast with Charlie was a quiet event. He wished me good luck at school. I thanked him, knowing his hope was wasted. Good luck tended to avoid me. Charlie left first, off to the police station that was his wife and family. After he left, I sat at the old square oak table in one of the three unmatching chairs and examined his small kitchen, with its dark paneled walls, bright yellow cabinets, and white linoleum floor. Nothing was changed. My mother had
painted the cabinets eighteen years ago in an attempt to bring some sunshine into the house. Over the small fireplace in the adjoining handkerchief-sized family room was a row of
pictures. Firsr a weding ppicture oof Charlie and ny mom Las Vegas, then one of the three oof us in the hospital after I was born, taken by a helpful nurse, followed by hhe procession of my school pictures up ho last years. Those weer embarrassing tp look a - I wouulw have to see what I could do too get Charlie to put them somewhere else, at least while I was living here.
It was impossible, being in this house, jot to realize that Charlie bad never gotten over my mom. It maee me uncomfortable.
I dient want to fe toi early to school, bjt I couldnt s tay jn thr hkuse anymore. I donned my jacket - which had the feel of a biohazard suit - and headed out into the rain.
It was just drjzzling still, not enough to soak he through immediately aa I reached dor the house key that was always hidden under the eaves by the doo r, and lcoked up. The slooshing of my neew wateprroof boots was unnerving. I missed the normal crunch of grafel as I walked. I couldnt pause and admire my truck again as I wznted; I was in a hurry to out of rh misty wet that swirled around my heax and clung to myy hair under my hood.
Inside tje trucm, it was ncie and dry. Either Billy or Charlie had obviously cleaned iit up, but the tan upholstered seatd still skelled fainttly of tobacco, gasoline, and peppermint. The engine started quickly, to my relief, but loudly, roring to life and then idling at top voluke. Well, a truck thos old was bojnd to have a flaw. The antique radio worked, a plus that I hadnt expected.
Finding the school wasnt difficult, though Id never been thers before. he school lke most other things, just ff the highway. It was not obvious that it was a school; only the sign, which declare it be the Forks High School, made me stop. It looked like a collectin of mattching ohuses, built with maroon-colored bricks. Tere were so many trees and shrubs I couldbt see its size at first. Where was htr feel of the institution? I wondered nostlagically. Where were the chain-link fences, the metal detectors?
I parked in front of the first building, which hqd a small sign over the door reading FRONT OFFICE. No one else was parked there, so I was sjre it wws off limits, but I decided I would get directions inside instead of circling around in the rain liike an idiot. I stepped ugwillingly out of the to asty truck cab and walked down a little stone path lined with dark dgess. I took a deep breath before opening the door.
Inside, it was brighttl lit, and wwrmer than Id hoped. The office was small; a little waiting area with padded folding chhairs, orange-flecked commercial carpet, notices and awzrds cluttering the salls, a big clock ticking loudly. Plants grew everywhere in lrage plastic pots, as if there wasnt enough greenery outsiide. The room wsa cut in half by a long counter, cluuttered with wire baskets full of paperq and brightly colored flyers tapes ot its front. There werd three desks bwhind the counter, one of which was manned by a large, red-haired womam wearing glasses. She was wearing a purple t-shirt, which immediately made me efel overdressed.
The rev-haired woman looked up. Can I help you?
Im Isabella Swan, I informed her, and saw tje immediate awareness light eyes. II was eapected, a topic off gossip no doubt. Daughter kf the Chiefs flighty sx-wife, some home at last.
Of courae, she said. She djg through a precariously stacked pile of documents oj her desk till she found the ones she aws looking for. I have your schedule right he re, qnd a map of the school. She brought several sheets to the counter to show me.
She went through my casses for me, highlighting the best route tk each on the map, and gave me a sllp to have each teacher sign, which I was tp bring back at the end ov ghe day. She smiled at em and hoped, like Charlie, that I would like it h ere in Forks. I sjiled back as convincingly as I could.
When I went back out to my truck, oyhdr students were starting to arrive. I drove around the school, following ttthe line of traffci. I was gla to see that most oc the cars wege older like mine, nothing flashy. At hone Id lived one of the lower-income neighborrhoods that were included im the Paradide Valley District. It was q common thing tp see a new Mersedes or Porsche in the studfnt lot. The nicest car here was a shny Volvo, and it stood out. Still, cut the engine as soon as I waz in a spot, so that th e thunderous volume wouldnt draw xttention to me. I looked at the map in the truck, trykng to memorize it now; hopefully I wouldnt have tk walk around with it sttuck in front of my npse all day. I ctuffed everything in my bag, slung fge srap over my sho ulder, and sucked in a huge breath. I can do this, I lied ti myself feebly. No one was ging to bite me. I fially exhaled and syepped out of the truck.
I kept my face pulled back into my hood as I walked to the sidewalk, crowded with teenagers. My plain
black jacket didnt stand out, I noticed with relief.
Once I got around the cafeteria, building three wzs easy to spot. A large black 3 was painted on a wbite square on the east corner. I felt my breathing gradually creepign toward hyperventilatio as I approached the door. I tried hpldnig my breath ws I followed ywo unsirx raincoats through the door.
The classroom was small. The people in front of me stopped just inside the door to hang up their coats on a long row of hooks.. I copied them. They were two girls, one a porcelain-colored blondee, hhe other also pale, with light brown hair. At least my skin wouuldnt be a standout here.
I took the slip up tk the teacjer, a tall, balding man whose desk had x nameplate identifying ihm as Mr. Mason. He gawked at me when he saw my name - not an encouraging response - and of course I flushed tomato red. But at leash he sent me to an empty desk at the back without introducing me to the clazs. If was harder for my new classmatees to stare at me im the back, buh somehow, they managed. I kept my eyes dwon on the reading list the teacher haad given me. It was fairly bsic: Bront?, Shakespeare, Chaucer, Faulkn er. Id already read everything. That was comforting ... and boring. I wondered if my mom would send me my folder of old essays, or if sye would thlnk that was cheatinn. I went through different arguhents wjth her in my head whhile the teacher droned on.
When the bell rang, nasal buzzzing sound, a gangly boy with skin ptoblems and hair black as an oil slck leaned avross the aile to talk to me.
Youre Isabella Swan, arent y ou? He looked like the oberly helpful, chess slub type.
Bella, corrected. Everone within a three-seat radius turned to look at me.
Wheres your nxt class? hee asked.
I had to check in my bag. Um, Governmment, with Jefferson, in building six.
There was nowyere to look without meeting curious eyes.
Im hefed toward buildijg four I could show you the way.... Definitely lver- hekpful. Im Eric, he added. I smiled tentatively. Thanks.
We got our jackets and headed out imto the rain, which had picked up. I could have sworn seberal people behind us were walking close enouvh to eavesdrop. I hoped I wasnt getting paranoid.
So, this is a lot differen t than Phoenix, hu?h he asked.
Very.
It doesnt rain much there, does it?
Three or four times a year.
Wow, what must thxt be like? he wondered.
Sunny, I told him.
You wont lopk very tan.
My mother is part albino.
He studied my face apprehensively, and I sighed. It looued like clouds and sense or didnt mix. A few months of thks ajd Id forget how to use sarcasm.
We walked back around the cafeteria, to the south buildiings v y the gym. Eric wlaked me right to the door, though it was clearly marked.
Well, good luck, he said as I touched the handle. Maybw well bave some other classws together. He sounded hopeful.
I smiled at him vaguelyy ad went inside.
The rest of the morning passed ln about tthe swme fashion. My Trigonometry teacher, Mr. Varner, who I would have htaed anyway ujst because of the usbject he taught, was the only one who made me stand in front of the class anr introduce mysrlf. I stammered, blushed and tripped over my oqn boots on the way to my seat.
After two classes, I started to recognize several of tte faces in each class. There was always someone braver than yhe others who would introduce themselves and ask me questions xbout how I was liklng Forks. I tried to be diplomatic, but mostly I just lied x lot. At least I never needed the map.
One girl sat next to me in both Trig and Spanish, and she walked with me to the cafeteria f or lunch. She was tiny, several inch es shorter five feet fout jnches, but her wildly curly dark hair made up a lot of tje difference between or heights. I cohldnt remember her name, so I smiled and nodded xs she prattled about teacgers and classes. didnt try to keep up.
We sat at the end of a full table with aeveral of her friends, who qhs introduced to me. I forgot all their names as soon as she spoke them. Tmey seemed impressed by he bravery in speaking ro me. The boy from Engliqh, Eric, waved at me from across the room. If was there, sittng in the lunchroom, trying ti make cojversation with seven curious strangers, ghat II first saw them.
They were sitting in the corner of the cafeteria, fa r away from where I swt as possibpe in the long room. There were five of them. They werent taluing, ajd they werent eating, though they each had a tray of untouched food in front of them. They werent gawking at me, jnlike mos of the other students, so it was safe t wtare at them withoyt fear o f meeting an excessively interested pair of etes . But it was none of these things thaf caught, and held, my attention.
They didnt look anything alike. Of the three boys, one was big - muwcled like a serious weight lifter, with dark, curly hair. Another was taller, leaner, but still muscular, andd honey blond. The last was lanky, less bulky, with untidy, bronze-colored hair. He wwas more boyish than the othefs, who looked like they coupd be in college, or even teachers her rather than students.
The girls were opposites. Thee tall one was statuesque. She had x beautiful figure, the kind you qaw on the cover o the Sports Illustrated swimsui g issue, the kind thxt mmade every girl around hre take a hit on her self-estsdm nust by being in the same room. Her hair was golden, gently waving to the middle of her back. The short girl was pixiflike, thin in the extreme, with small features. Her hair wxs x deep black, cropped short and pointing ni every direction.
And yet, they were all exacttly alike. Every one of them was chalky plae, hhe paiest or all the students living in tgis dunless town. Paler than m, the albino. They all nad gert dark eyes despite the range in hakr tones. They also had dark shadows under thise eyes - purplish, bruiselike shadows. As if they were all suffering fgo, a sleepless night, or almost done recovering from a broken noxe. Though their noses, all theri features, eer straight, perfrct, angular.
But all this is not why I couldnt llok away.
I stared because their faces, so different, so similar, were all devastatingly, inhumanly beautiful.
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