CupOfTea (Learning_English) все записи автора

TRY IT :" - шепнула DREAM.
"Что? AGAIN? ? ? ? ! " - возмутился EXPERIENCE.
"Хе, снова BECAUSE OF меня)))" - улыбнулась REASON.
"Нет! BECAUSE OF меня! ! ! ! "- поспорила PRIDE.
"А MAYBE : не надо? " - пролепетала CARE.
" CARE, иди в ASS! " - гаркнула COURAGE.
"Я закрыта на ADVENTURE! " - отмазалась ASS.
"HERE I AM! " - объявила DECISION.
"А MAYBE лучше завтра? " - поинтересовалось DOUBT.
"Сегодня или NEVER! " - отрезало STUBBORNESS.
"THE MAIN THING только не как вчера! " - предупредила COMMONNESS.
"Вчерашнее не REPEAT " - успокоила STUPIDITY.
"Всё будет ANOTHER WAY! " - соврало FEELING.
"На что-то это LIKE. . " - задумалась MEMORY.
"Суки вы ALL :" - вставая и SHAKING OFF процедила сквозь зубы DREAM

never_givin_up (Learning_English) все записи автора

The world is your mirror.
The good you find in others, is in you too.
The faults you find in others, are your faults as well.
After all, to recognize something you must know it.
The possibilities you see in others, are possible for you as well.
The beauty you see around you, is your beauty.
The world around you is a reflection, a mirror showing you the person you are.
To change your world, you must change yourself.
See the best in others, and you will be your best.
Give to others, and you will give to yourself.
Appreciate beauty, and you will be beautiful.
Admire creativity, and you will be creative.
Love, and you will be loved.
Seek to understand, and you will be understood.
Listen, and your voice will be heard.
Teach, and you will learn. (c)

angryrat (Learning_English) все записи автора

A preacher concluded that his church was getting into very serious financial troubles. While checking the church storeroom, he discovered several cartons of new Bibles that had never been opened and distributed.
So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the congregation who would be willing to sell the Bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise the desperately-needed money for the church.
Jack, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the task.
The minister knew that Jack and Paul earned their living as salesmen and were likely capable of selling some Bibles. But he had serious doubts about Louie who was a local farmer, who had always kept to himself because he was embarrassed by his speech impediment. Poor Louis stuttered badly. But, not wanting to discourage Louis, the minister decided to let him try anyway.
He sent the three of them away with the back seat of their cars stacked with Bibles. He asked them to meet with him and report the results of their door-to-door selling efforts the following Sunday.
Anxious to find out how successful they were, the minister immediately asked Jack, 'Well, Jack, how did you make out selling our Bibles last week?'
Proudly handing the minister an envelope, Jack replied, 'Using my sales prowess, I was able to sell 20 Bibles, and here's the $200 I collected on behalf of the church.'
'Fine job, Jack!' The minister said, vigorously shaking his hand. 'You are indeed a fine salesman and the Church is indebted to you.'
Turning to Paul, 'And Paul, how many Bibles did you sell for the church last week?'
Paul, smiling and sticking out his chest, confidently replied, 'I am a professional salesman. I sold 28 bibles on behalf of the church, and here's $280 I collected.'
The minister responded, 'That's absolutely splendid, Paul. You are truly a professional salesman and the church is indebted to you.'
Apprehensively, the minister turned to Louie and said, 'And Louie, did you manage to sell any Bibles last week?' Louie silently offered the minister a large envelope.
The minister opened it and counted the contents. 'What is this?' the minister exclaimed. 'Louie, there's $3200 in here! Are you suggesting that you sold 320 Bibles for the church, door to door, in just one week?'
Louie just nodded. That's impossible!' both Jack and Paul said in unison. 'We are professional salesmen, yet you claim to have sold 10 times as many Bibles as we could...'
'Yes, this does seem unlikely,' the minister agreed. 'I think you'd better explain how you managed to accomplish this, Louie.'
Louie shrugged. 'I-I-I re-re-really do-do-don't kn-kn-know f-f-f-for sh-sh-sh-sure,' he stammered.
Impatiently, Peter interrupted. 'For crying out loud, Louie, just tell us what you said to them when they answered the door!'
'A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-said wa-wa-was,' Louis replied, 'W-w-w-w-would y-y-y-you l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to b-b-b-buy th-th-th-this b-b-b-b-bible F-f-for t-t-ten b-b-b-bucks ---o-o-o-or--- wo-wo-would yo-you j-j-j-just l-like m-m-me t-t-to st-st-stand h-h-here and r-r-r-r-r-read it t-to y-y-you??'

angryrat (Learning_English) все записи автора

In London an old priest lay dying in the hospital. For years he had faithfully served the people of the nation's capital. He motioned for his nurse to come near.
"Yes, Father ?" said the nurse.
"I would really like to see Prime Minister and the Chancellor before I die", whispered the priest.
"I'll see what I can do, Father", replied the nurse.
The nurse sent the request to Parliament and waited for a response.
Soon the word arrived; Prime Minister Gordon Brown and Darling would be delighted to visit the priest.
As they went to the hospital, Gordon commented to Darling, "I don't know why the old priest wants to see us, but it will certainly will help our images and might even get me re~elected Prime Minister. After all, I'm IN IT TO WIN IT".
Darling agreed that it was a good thing.
When they arrived at the priest's room, the priest took Gordon's hand in his right hand and Alistair's hand in his left.
There was silence and a look of serenity on the old priest's face.
Finally Gordon spoke. "Father, of all the people you could have chosen, why did you choose us to be with you as you near the end ?"
The old priest slowly replied, "I have always tried to pattern my life after our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ."
"Amen", said Gordon. "Amen", said Alistair.
The old priest continued, "Jesus died between two lying thieves; I would like to do the same."

angryrat (Learning_English) все записи автора

A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it.
(Women's restroom - Dick's Last Resort: Dallas , Texas )

At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry.
(Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea: Tucson , Arizona )

Beauty is only a light switch away.
(Perkins Library - Duke University : Durham , North Carolina .)
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angryrat (Learning_English) все записи автора

SOME parents can be cruel – or down right stupid – when naming their kids.
SUE AGE - Born Glasgow, 1849.
PETER PIDDLE - Baptized Fowey, Cornwall, 1649.
ENEMA BOTTOMLEY WOOD - Died Huddersfield, 1904.
SEYMOUR BUST - Born Halstead, Essex, 1841.
PLEASANT TITTY - Baptized Margate, Kent, 1768.
(She was named after her mom — so the family had a pair of Pleasant Tittys.)
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angryrat (Learning_English) все записи автора

The old man placed order for one hamburger, French fries and a drink. He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one half in front of his wife. He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife.
He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them . As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people around them were looking over and whispering.
Obviously they were thinking, 'That poor old couple - all they can afford is one meal for the two of them.'
As the man began to eat his fries a young man came to the table and politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple. The old man said, they were just fine - they were used to sharing everything..
People closer to the table noticed the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite. She sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink.
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angryrat (Learning_English) все записи автора

A blonde hurried into the emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger shot off. 'How did this happen?' the emergency room doctor asked her. 'Well, I was trying to commit suicide,' the blonde replied. 'What?' sputtered the doctor. 'You tried to commit suicide by shooting off your finger?' 'No, Silly' the blonde said. 'First I put the gun to my chest, and then I thought, 'I just paid $6,000.00 for these
implants. I'm not shooting myself in the chest.' 'So then?' asked the doctor. 'Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought, 'I just paid $3,000.00 to get my teeth straightened. I'm not shooting myself in the mouth.' 'So then?' 'Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: 'This is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in my other ear before I pulled the trigger.

soul_sincerity (Learning_English) все записи автора

Как правильно перевести сочетания:
family gatherings
stable upbringing
physical resembance

never_givin_up (Learning_English) все записи автора

 Не знаю, нужно ли вам это. Но все таки - тайный язык интернет-конференций или же сокращения.
AAMOF
As A Matter Of Fact
По существу дела, фактически

ADN
Any day now
В любое время
Когда угодно

AFAIK
As Far As I Know
На сколько я знаю
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