angryrat (Learning_English) все записи автора

 This took a lot of work to put together!!!


You think English is easy???

Read to the end . . . a new twist


1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce .

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present .

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Умно-Красиво-Скромная (Learning_English) все записи автора

 Проверьте, насколько хорошо Вы знаете особенности употребления наречий и прилагательных?
Правильные ответы даны в конце теста:

Gothic_Kabbalah (Learning_English) все записи автора

 Who Says Punctuation Doesn't Matter?

Dear John Letter #1 Dear John: I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy -- will you let me be yours? Jane

Dear John Letter #2: Dear John: I want a man who knows what love is. All about you are generous, kind, thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me. For other men, I yearn. For you, I have no feelings whatsoever. When we're apart, I can be forever happy. Will you let me be? Yours, Jane

Умно-Красиво-Скромная (Learning_English) все записи автора

 Предлагаю некоторые фразы, которые помогут вам в нужный момент выразить свое согласие или несогласие с собеседником.

never_givin_up (Learning_English) все записи автора

If you're tired of London, you're tired of life, cause there is in London all that life can afford (c)

angryrat (Learning_English) все записи автора

 A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady.
She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up.
After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.
She repeats this gesture about five more times.

When she is about to hand him another batch again he asks the little old lady, 'Why don't you eat the peanuts yourself?'.
'We can't chew them because we've no teeth', she replied.

The puzzled driver asks, 'Why do you buy them then?'
The old lady replied, 'We just love the chocolate around them.'

angryrat (Learning_English) все записи автора

 Grandma and Grandpa were driving from Washington to Florida to attend their granddaughters graduation from medical school.

Halfway through their trip, they stopped to visit one of their sons in Kansas for a night. Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in the medicine cabinet. He asked his son about using one of the pills.

The son said, "I don't think you should take one Dad, they're very strong and very expensive."

How much?" asked Grandpa. "Around $10.00 a pill," answered the son.

I don't care," said Grandpa, "I'd still like to try one, we'll be leaving early in the morning, so I'll put the money under the pillow."

Later the next morning, the son found $110.00 under the pillow. He immediately called Grandpa on his cell phone and said, "I told you each

pill was $10.00, not $110.00.

"I know," said Grandpa. "The hundred is from Grandma."

angryrat (Learning_English) все записи автора

 The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English'.
In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as
replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'.
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl

Она_вам_приснилась (Learning_English) все записи автора

 Wish you could hear. Love is all we need. Kick out the Jams. Kick out your mother. Cut up your friend. Screw up your brother or he'll get you in the End.помогите перевести,пожалуйста