So. I was thinking of friendship, of people. I wouldn't dare to say that my thoughts can be called optimistic. IMHO, we don't have many friends in our days, none of us. I speak about very good friends, not about mates, colleagues or people you communicate with gladly and know them long enough to trust, but whom you still can't call a good friend.
I thought that there are enough people of great importance for me. But it was much easier when I could see them everyday. I cannot. Or, if to be more precise, I don't. There are a lot of people I know, but if to speak of people whom I see everyday, constantly, there are only my family and my group.
I won't call my family friends (though they are kind of) perhaps, although, because a relative means even more to me than a friend. Especially, those of them whom I see everyday.
Then I asked myself, whether there is at least one person in my group whom I can call a friend. I thought a long time, looking from many points of view, trying to be objective. To my horror, the answer was "no". Noone, no single person. I thought about it before, but today's mood... Let's go further.
There are people whom like very much, about 4 or 5. But... it's only this. Maybe something happens, maybe it all changes, even maybe to the better. We'll see. I just wanna show what happens right now.
Sometimes I feel myself down in the dupms, as before. Sometimes I am almost as merry as long before. But for instance today... It wasn't all that nice. I wonder why. But still there's no answer. What? Does it mean that the relationships in group are not of interest to me? I won't say so.. I won't say anything because I don't want to be unfair.
One girl said it won't be any good today according to the horoscope. But the only not good was one thing I'll do later, I hope so... Everything else was fine. From not falling asleep during the studies to purchasing a nice book that is going to be read by your most humble servant)))
