вот людям делать больше нечего...

Может сначала стоит поместить все переводы?

Наживился!!!!! АААААААААААААА!!!!!!!!!111111

З.Ы. Как насчет моей идеи, о которой я писал тебе в одной из личек (ГК -> КШ)?

Зря, перевели бы лучше на инглиш, штоль. Из местных-то так никто вопще не поймёт.

- The funny story told to Hao by Grisha (it can be seen in the “Deleted scenes” section) is a real story, happened on the Plastic Arts lesson back in the Author’s school.
-> Fine Arts, not Plastic. Просьба заменить.

- The Author’s note. To all these house critics out there: the word “rosser” is a real existing word meaning “battre”.
-> Sure, sure, my young friend the crab.

- (Colin Farrell and Samuel L. Jackson).
-> Первый из них - гомик.

И вообще, купи слона.

Мда...

"Not studies and not estimations me now disturb!" - это даже Шекспира чем-то напоминает. Но в отдельный пост я это ставить не буду - пусть остается здесь.

Вуаля. Вещь действительно оч. ржачная, поетому особо нервным людям читать не рекомендую (во избежание нежелаемых мочеиспусканий хехехе).

---

Grisha Of konov and murder in the school. (artistic transfer of story Grisha Konov et la meurtre a l'.ecole.) It is devoted Dzhiya fie Lyu and Dzhiya To khungu Lyu, to my good school friends. After collision from bratvoy Turgena, Grisha Of konov no longer knew problems in its school life. No one prevented it from learn, no one attacked it with the cams and no one attempted even to jeer above it. All students of third sekondera understood the important thing: in Grishi now there is a strong friend, yes even itself Of konov no longer that slabak, such as it was earlier. All understood that it became more confident in itself and already no longer it lingered, when the matter concerned its personal protection. Grisha was weakened. He knew that now nothing threatens to it. And it properly began to love life... But heavy misfortune fell down to it to the head after several months, it would seem, eternal happiness... * * * After arriving into the school during one excellent day, Grisha it saw its best friend Khao, that stands near the school entrance. The expression of its face simply shocked Konova... Melancholy was read on face Khao! From its eyes the tears were torn away... The tears, which it weakly attempted to hide from others... Grisha already ran, no, it flew to its friend... It had to know however, that it happened which forced courageous Khao to begin to cry... - Khao, that with you? Why you do cry? Describe to me, in what the matter! If something with the studies not then, tell me, do not be troubled! 4 help by all, than to smog... Khao it glanced at its friend by heavy view, and Grisha as if dipped into the abyss of desperation... - no, my dear friend Of grisha! Not studies and not estimations me now disturb! This something another... And it does have nothing in common with the school... - however, that this? - 4 is forced to tell to you very heavy news, Grisha! About this to me they described yesterday in the evening... On the whole... Our family will soon cross to the new apartment. And I will be is newly forced to pass into another school. The heart Of konova gromko-gromko knocked in its breast, as if threatening into any minute to jump out from there to the white light. Then as if strong icy hand squeezed it. Grisha of prikipel to the place. It did not believe to its ears. Its best friend soon will move, and they more never will be seen. More they not will be never together, will not be obtained pleasure from the contact, will not help each other in the studies and will not hear customary or entirely new jokes from each other as this was always... this was the worst moment in the life Grishi. He never thought that something similar can occur... Indeed he more never will see its friend... But Khao continued its sad speech: - all this time when we lived in our present apartment, we searched for other, which would be located more closely to the place of the work of my father. It works very far hence, so that for the road lots of the time (to it they pay insufficiently so that it could purchase to itself the machine) there in it departs, yes and is late it always. But this greatly does not please itself its chief. It already threatened to discharge my dad. Therefore we searched for... And here yesterday exactly they found... Version is ideal... Apartment is located directly opposite the building of the company, in which works my father. Tomorrow we there cross. Konov it is hollow into quiet hysterics. It itself already began to cry. It did not believe... No, it did not believe in the truthfulness of proceeding in it on the eyes of the disgraceful end of this strong friendship... But he was succeeded in pronouncing: - Lord... There is no God my,! But... But that 4... What 4 without you make I will be? How I will live? 4 I do not want... you to lose. I please you, by Christ- god I adjure, Khao, say to me that you simply joke... this cannot... You do hear? It cannot... be... truth! But its friend only rocked by the head: - There is no, Grisha! I said the cleanest truth to you... And I desire to you success subsequently. I will soon ring you, I will give my new number of telephone so that we could continue to contact. Sometimes we can even let us see each other vzhivuyu... Here doors into the school were opened, and students were fixed by the inward long and incessant flow... Grisha still never felt itself so badly during the lessons and in all the remaining free time of day... It was completely squeezed out psychologically... It cried... It was simple in the desperation... As everything was badly... Difficult it was to describe this state of deep melancholy, which absorbed it during that day... After the lessons Of grisha and Khao they shook to each other of hand into the sign of friendship and respect for each other. But then from the school it left Khao... It left forever... Grisha for long looked at its moved away silhouette... And from its eyes tears dripped... After returning home, Grisha rushed to the bed and wept to the end of the day. In that day its parents worked to midnight; therefore they so nothing learned about to mountain Grishi. Although them- that he never said about existence Khao... Therefore its grief Of konov mourned itself... So For Grishi Konova It began New Life. More precisely trying. Life, complete of tortures and sufferings. After withdrawal Khao it again remained one. It was again lonely, without the united friend, without someone next, who understood it... Grisha continued to learn, making all the same enormous efforts. Its estimations were again among the good. But its life was no longer that without Khao To liu. But it continued to drag its pitiful existence... this was its life... What could it make? Indeed she it selected itself... * * * Once, after the fourth (and last) lesson, when in the school already almost no one not it was, Konov it went to the important additional occupation to mes'e to Le Blanc, its teacher of information theory. This dopzanyatiye was very necessary For grishe, therefore as he badly understood theme of lesson passable at that moment. He knew that, if Khao it would be a number, then it would immediately help Konovu and into two calculations everything explained to it more intelligible than the instructor. Therefore as Khao information theory it examined not worse very mes'e of Le Blanc. But Khao greater than not was with it, and Grisha was forced itself to solve its problems. After approaching the door of the office of information theory, Grisha heard someone's voice, which was being reached from within. This voice was to it completely unknown. Entire the time when Konov it learned in its school, it was introduced to all its teachers and it knew the voices of all (in it it was very good memory). But this was the voice of completely new person... Being very curious from the generation, Grisha decided to listen to, about which goes the conversation in the office... Stranger spoke, judging by everything, on the cell phone: - * with happiness *... yes, boss! Mission is executed! I removed vorishku! Before there as it "to clean", I questioned it thoroughly, and it explained to me, how he was succeeded in you robbing with the aid of the computer... It was so good that even it explained to me as to you these money to return... * pause * Blagodarstvuyu, boss... * pause * ugh you! Yes undoubtedly to me approaches this sum! So that... I do return to the base? * pause * OK... OK... I will be after 10 minutes... * pause * OK! To the connection! At this moment, curiosity Grishi it conquered its fear. It only opened slightly door and glanced inward. That that he there saw, forced it to emit the howl of horror... On the floor of office by formless heap lay to mes'e Le Blanc, as if he prikornul temporarily. But the second fleeting glance on his body refuted the first erroneous thought Grishi. In the forehead of teacher turned black the small hole, from which to the floor by slender stream flowed the blood. But near the computer of instructor stood high and sinewy man, dressed in entire black. In his right hand he held pistol with the muffler. This was Beretta 92, that, which Grisha recently admiration observed in action in its dear computer game "Hitman", was nominal. But to that it was and game, that in it the player could die and revive an infinite quantity of times, whereas now, in the real life, after one shot of this "toy" Grisha greater than never no longer could rise... The reaction of peasant in the black was instantaneous. It Raised Berettu... Certain internal voice in the head Grishi began to yell: "lies!" Konov immediately carried out this order. In the same second it heard two shots, which merged into one. But this sound resembled more the cotton, which izdayet the plug, which departs from the bottle of champagne, when it is opened. Muffler made its matter properly and smoothly. Bullets they flew overhead Grishi, after leaving holes in the wall opposite the door into the office, but so without having caught it. But he knew that the danger still exists. And then Konov it is mechanical, even without thinking, it crawled on all fours into the corridor, where immediately it rose. All this occurred less than in three seconds. But killer again reacted with the stunning rapidity. Second ago he stood in the table of teacher, and he were now located already at the door. After rejecting hand forward, it struck Grishu into the person. And that again fell.... Second time raising Berettu, killer impassively said: - Prosti, of course, my young friend, but you know that those, who much know, temporarily leave in the living. 4 I cannot allow you to plant me into tyuryagu for the wet matter. So that, shut eyes! I give to you several seconds so that you would pray for the last time... Thus far he spoke, Grisha nervously reflected... Suddenly, it devised how to disentangle from this situation. The solution, which it accepted, was not that that dangerous, but by simply foolish. But it could save to it life... With the cry of the desperation Of grisha from all forces it struck the hand of peasant in the black by its leg (it beaters on the hand, which it held Berettu). The pistol, to which they suddenly gave nonweak acceleration, flew away into the distant angle of corridor...... but killer it already obtained from the special pocket long combat knife. Here he raised it... Here narrower than Grisha it shut eyes and began to read its last prayer...... but nothing it occurred! It was still living! Konov it opened eyes and saw something the splendid: the security agents of school, which came running to the cry Grishi, dragged away from it killer. That furiously escaped from their hands, but they strongly killer, without giving to it chances to the flight. And Grisha Of konov sighed from the lightening... Suddenly, for killer it was possible to free one hand. It here struck the first agent into the person, and thus far that fell, made to it a skillful step. The body of the first agent yet did not have time to touch floor, but killer already flew against the second. From the impact into the stomach face of the second agent writhed from the pain. But this lasted not more than second. Depicting the severe pain (on to it it fell not too and strongly), agent suddenly attacked. The killer collapsed to the earth, but here and arose from the impact into the foot. He was ready to further struggle. At this moment the bullet, released from the pistol with the muffler, struck into the floor near the right foot of killer. Berettu held Grisha. Man in the black stepped back, vidya, that the threat became serious. - I recommend to you to raise hands and not to move! Then it threw Berettu one of the agents and left... Everything was ended... And at this moment on the eyes Grishi appeared the tears of happiness... During the same day the killer was planted into the prison. Examination was to him arranged according to all rules. Finally, it they broke, and it described everything. Information theory to mes'e Le Blanc stole the sufficiently large sum of money in Mark- Andre lap'er, leader of one of criminal groupings of city. He stole these money, using its khakerskiye talents (no one he knew about them before this case). Then Mark- Andre traced it and sent killer- professional to it in order to question him and to remove. At this moment appeared Grisha. Entire bandits, yes even their chief, was sent for the prison for the long terms, since the cleft killer much that is what described about these people and about their activity. However, Grisha was generously rewarded. It even they wanted to proclaim the hero of city the first time for entire his life. But, being very modest, it asked to preserve everything in the secret and no one about this not to tell. But, nevertheless, Grisha Of konov was happy. From the childhood it dreamed to become policeman. And it was glad, very rad, since it could show the police important service during this great day. This even more greatly bolstered its confidence in the selection of the profession of policeman as its future work... Vlad_Bagrov_Brat_e Original version: 30.06.2003 augmented version: 01.12.2003

Появилась идея заебать второй рассказ в оригинале в онлайн-переводчик и сделать дословный перевод на инглиш в стиле "I you give normal". Интересно, но боюсь - не одобрят.

Да и вопще т.с. фсо, што мне нравится в расскзах Владика так ето безупречность стиля письма, но только если написан сам рассказ парусски.
В етом ему действительно не откажеш.

Исходное сообщение Злобная_Волка

это при том что главный герой списан с автора.

Хуёво судить, к тому аффтар ето сам уже отрицает.
Если я пишу Mournville, то вовсе не факт што в Сида Мэйерса или там Вергана я обязательно должен имплантировать частичку себя.
(Хотя не говорю што етого не делаю...)

Все персоннажи выдуманны, это при том что главный герой списан с автора. Не клеится малек.

Давай!

Кста, моэт иллюстрации к рассказу сделать?

Исходное сообщение Феб_де_Шатопер

Мой совет - поставь там рейтинг, типа 18+, а лучше вообще - R, I mean Rated_R... :)

Rated Rosse

Я не критиковал, а лишь указал на твои, по-моему, самые серьезные ошибки...

З.Ы. Можешь и не согласиться... Бог с тобой... Твой перевод - твое дело...

*ушел спать*

Исходное сообщение Феб_де_Шатопер
Стан, ты как всегда отходишь от темы...

Ты написал как раз "из ноги", т.е. из кожной мякоти, а не "из кобуры, прикрепленной к ноге" (тому подобное)...

Согласись, звучит по-разному...

Вася, поебать мне как-то. Што перед собой имел то и написал.
Могу поспорить што 85% читателей в принцыпе и поймут, што из кобуры, а не из самой бля ноги.

Кстати, вы пачиму критикуете мою версию моего же перевода? Заметьте, к вашей я не лез.

Стан, ты как всегда отходишь от темы...

Ты написал как раз "из ноги", т.е. из кожной мякоти, а не "из кобуры, прикрепленной к ноге" (тому подобное)...

Согласись, звучит по-разному...

ОК... Сейчас хорошо...

Спасибо за выраженную благодарность... :)

Molest!

Правильно будет "неизвестно каким способом", грамотей... А вообще, этого не было в рассказе...

З.Ы. При чем тут Завулон? В рассказе имеется в виду реальная ситуация... Как ты себе представляешь киллера, который все это время бегал с ножом в ноге?

Исправь "убийтсво" на "убийство" (в заглавии поста) - я там правильно написал...

*читает*

*вспоминает вчерашнюю ржачку*

*снова громко ржет*

А все-таки "весьма незнамо каким именно образом" - это безусловная классика... Как и то, как убийтса вытаскивал нож из собственной ноги (!!!) ("Терминатор 1" отдыхает)...

Уже наверное шестое спасибо на дню получяю...
Кстати, во-первых не Уайт а Вайт, а во-вторых я же просил ошыбки исправить.

2КТ

"Петушка" помнишь? :)