"Okay, okay! I take it back. Unfuck you!"
Ëàäíî, ëàäíî, áåðó ñâîè ñëîâà îáðàòíî. Íå õîäèòå íàõóé.
"You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing."
Âû ãîâîðèòå, ÷òî ÿ ñóêà, òàê, êàê áóäòî ýòî ïëîõî.
"Well, this day was a total waste of make-up."
Ìäà, ýòîò äåíü - íàïðàñíàÿ òðàòà ìàêèÿæà.
"Well, aren't we a fuckin ray of sunshine?"
Íó, è ðàçâå ìû íå ãðåáàíûé ëó÷èê ñîëíöà?
"Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after."
Íå áåñè ìåíÿ, ÿ ñ÷àñòëèâ êàê íèêîãäà.
"EXCUSE ME...Do I look like a people person?"
ÏÐÎÑÒÈÒÅ... íåóæåëè ÿ ïîõîæ íà ëþáèìöà ïóáëèêè?
"This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting!"
Íåò, ýòî íå îôèñ. Ýòî àä ñ ëàìïàìè äíåâíîãî ñâåòà!
"I started out with nothing and still have most of it left."
ß íà÷èíàë, íè÷åãî íå èìåÿ, è áîëüøàÿ ÷àñòü ýòîãî äî ñèõ ïîð ñî ìíîé.
"Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose."
Òåðàïèÿ - ýòî äîðîãî. Ëîïàòü ïóçûðüêè íà óïàêîâêå - äåøåâî. Âàì âûáèðàòü.
"Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control?"
Ïî÷åìó áû âàì íå ïîïðîáîâàòü ñëó÷àéíî ïðîÿâèòü èíòåëëåêò èëè - ñîâåðøåííî áåñññìûñëåííûé - àêò ñàìîêîíòðîëÿ?
"I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30 years."
ß íå ñóìàñøåäøèé. Ïðîñòî ó ìåíÿ óæå 30 ëåò ïëîõîå íàñòðîåíèå.
"Sarcasm is just one more service I offer."
Ñàðêàçì - ýòî ïðîñòî åùå îäíà ïðåäëàãàåìàÿ ìíîé óñëóãà.
"Do they ever shut up on your planet?"
Íà âàøåé ïëàíåòå êîãäà-íèáóäü ìîë÷àò?
"I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable"
ß âàì íå ïîäõîæó. ß íå íàäóâíîé.
"Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realise you haven't gone to sleep yet."
Ñòðåññ - ýòî êîãäà òû ïðîñûïàåøüñÿ îò ñîáñòâåííîãî êðèêà è ïîíèìàåøü, ÷òî òû åùå è íå çàñûïàë.
"Back off!! You're standing in my aura."
Íàçàä!! Âû ñòîèòå íà ìîåé àóðå!
"Don't worry. I forgot your name too."
Íå âîëíóéòåñü, ÿ òîæå çàáûë êàê âàñ çîâóò.
"I work 55 hours a week to be this poor."
ß ðàáîòàþ 55 ÷àñîâ â íåäåëþ, ÷òîáû áûòü ýòèì íè÷òîæåñòâîì.
"Not all men are annoying. Some are dead."
Íå âñå ëþäè ìåíÿ ðàçäðàæàþò. Íåêîòîðûå ìåðòâû.
"Wait...I'm trying to imagine you with a personality"
Ñòîï... ÿ ïûòàþñü ïðåäñòàâèòü âàñ êàê ëè÷íîñòü.
"Chaos, panic and disorder. My work here is done."
Õàîñ, ïàíèêà è áåñïîðÿäîê. ×òî æå, çäåñü ìîÿ ðàáîòà çàêîí÷åíà.
"Ambivalent? Well, yes and no."
Ïðîòèâîðå÷èâûé? Íó, è äà è íåò.
"You look like shit. Is that the style now?"
Âû âûãëÿäèòå êàê äåðüìî. Ýòî òåïåðü ñòèëü òàêîé?
"Earth is full. Go home."
Çåìëÿ ïåðåïîëíåíà. Óáèðàéòåñü ê ñåáå äîìîé.
"Aw, did I step on your poor little bitty ego?"
Îé, ÿ íàñòóïèë íà âàøå áåäíîå ìàëåíüêîå ðàçíîøåðñòíîå ýãî?
"I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert."
ß íå íàïðÿæåí, ïðîñòî î÷åíü, î÷åíü âíèìàòåëåí.
"A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth."
Ýðåêöèÿ íå ñ÷èòàåòñÿ ïåðñîíàëüíûì ðîñòîì.
Ïðèìå÷àíèå: â îáùåì-òî ôðàç äîëæíî áûòü 29, äâå áûëè óáðàíû ïî ïðè÷èíå "íå ñìåøíî" èëè òî÷íåå "áðåäîâî"))
Âñ¸ îñòàëüíîå îñòàâèëà êàê åñòü)