THREE WOMEN -- ONE GERMAN, ONE JAPANESE AND A
HILLBILLY -- WERE SITTING NAKED IN A SAUNA. SUDDENLY
THERE WAS A BEEPING SOUND.
THE GERMAN PRESSED HER FOREARM AND THE BEEP
STOPPED. THE OTHERS LOOKED AT HER QUESTIONINGLY.
"THAT WAS MY PAGER, SHE SAID. "I HAVE A MICROCHIP
UNDER THE SKIN OF MY ARM."

A FEW MINUTES LATER, A PHONE RANG. THE JAPANESE
WOMEN LIFTED HER PALM TO HER EAR. WHEN SHE
FINISHED, SHE EXPLAINED, "THAT WAS MY MOBILE
PHONE. I HAVE A MICROCHIP IN MY HAND."

THE HILLBILLY WOMAN FELT DECIDEDLY LOW TECH. NOT TO
BE OUTDONE, SHE DECIDED SHE HAD TO DO SOMETHING
JUST AS IMPRESSIVE.

SHE STEPPED OUT OF THE SAUNA AND WENT TO THE
BATHROOM. SHE RETURNED WITH A PIECE OF TOILET
PAPER HANGING FROM HER BEHIND. THE OTHERS
RAISED THEIR EYEBROWS AND STARED AT HER.
THE HILLBILLY WOMAN FINALLY SAID, "WELL, WILL YOU
LOOK AT THAT. I'M GETTIN' A FAX."