i am god damn jealous and im god damn insecure yeah thats what i am. i dotn know maybe im not maybe im right. usualluyy im right aobut these things. i think for some reason my bf will cheat on me and go back to his ex and leave me all hurt and alone...omg i think ill have to kill myself if that really happened. i will. it hurts to get hurt. if he does do that ill make him opay. he will not live in peace and harmony. he will scream in his dream and dream of screaming in his dream. it will ne a a nightmare. i hate it when stuff like htat happens but he seems like the potential type. fuck i dotn understand why he still communicates with her and write in her journal i bet he still have affections for her. i dont know what to do. i just hope tomorrow i wont wake up and nothing will happen..i wont even exist. i really want to kill myself tonight. i reallyd o. i cant stand this insanity anymore. i just cant. i cant believe it. i love him so much but i dont know or should i say im not sure if he loves me. this is so fucked up. i think im too stressed out due to school and work. i will go bye

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