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preZvezda - My Own Truth...

Пятница, 27 Февраля 2009 г. 06:55 + в цитатник
omg... I can't believe it... Yeah, u already know what's happening... Again, the same. Again. I can't believe it... I'm in the same situation again, the same f····in place... What else can i do? I dunno. "i love u" - yeah, i know.. it's not enough for me anymore. I'm seriously thinkin about it... Can i lie myself again? Can i? Is it possible to keep lying myself, more time? How long can i handle it? Can i? I'm not pretty sure yet... After all, a happy ending for my story is not the reality. It won't be. Never.
We r friends now. Yeah, like she wanted, she really wished it. And now she got it. Now is just my friend. I hope she be happy now. Anyway, what i feel is not important at all, it never was... So, it's ok. For her, it's a solution. For me, it's nothing. Just one more reason to feel sad, to feel alone, to break myself down, AGAIN... I don't understand it... I don't understand her... I can't understand..
I know, my friends will be sooo happy now. Guys, i've done what u told me to do! Finaly!!! Yeah, happy smiles, like the disk.. The same second meaning like the disk... Yeah, u will be soo proud now.
And me? What must i do now? With all this love, with all this sadness inside me???? Now what??? Try to forget? Try to "believe" my own truth? It doesnt help me anymore.


Special People ^^

Среда, 25 Февраля 2009 г. 04:12 + в цитатник
I hate my blog on BlogSpot ¬¬ But i dunno what to do... I love make posts but not there... Here is the real me... What should i do?? =S I guess maybe i can just erase it, and start posting more here.. But i wanna keep it like sec ret til i get more posts, more stuff, more everything...
I'm so happy, cause i have soo many special and nice ppl with me, i mean contacs, that r really becoming my friends. BTW,Thank u Wojtek ^^
The another day i met new ppl ^^ Between all, there is Carlo ((hi my friend, how r u? ^^ r u still there?)) that i really need to say it, i dunno why but i really feel connection, is very beautiful talk to him ^^ I feel happy ^^ I feel lucky, special ppl i know everyday ^^
Ok guys, nothing more... Try to keep your eyes on this site, cause i will publish some little parts of my book "Zvezda" so i really hope u like them ^^
The pic today is from a screen of a concert, the Performance @ MTVMA 2003. I loved the performance, reminds me the day when i saw it live and direct in MTV!!! ^^ I really miss this times, i'm a little bit scared not to enjoy the new t.A.T.u. time, cause i'm just stuck to the old times... :( But i'm sure that my faatism is true, and i will never loose it ^^ My perfect Volchitsa ^^
Carlo, thank u soooo much to be here, i'm really lucky to met u ;) see ya! ciao!!!



Понедельник, 23 Февраля 2009 г. 12:53 + в цитатник
Another day ^^ And now i don't feel so bad like the others... I was all night in the forum, listenin' 2 CB and downloadin' pix and fonts... Yesterday i met Alex, is a guy here in my country ^^ I'm so happy to meet special people here, it's hard to find them... Even in my country.
And i was doing some buttons and logos... I'll upload 1 tomorrow ^^


CB - Dysfunctional Family

Суббота, 21 Февраля 2009 г. 08:35 + в цитатник
Another day... omg, another day!!!?? Ok.. Let's try to take it..
I'm still like yesterday... Yeah, i'll stay this way for a long long time... I'm really sorry for the ppl who ((i think)) love me. I'm listening to "dysfunctional family", by CB... Here r the lyrics... I like this song... u can download it here-->

I'm a punk, I'm a sinner / I'm lost new beginner / I'm a threat to myself / I'm a get armargeddon
I'm a freak, I'm a liar / I'm a flirt, I deny that I know it, Then I mess it up

And sometimes I feel like / I'm only one / No wonder why I've become / So dum so dum di dum di dum

I get more and more strange / I'm going insane, I'm building it up
Just to break it down. / You get what you see
The product of a dysfunctional family

I'm a bit suicidal / I'm my own worst rival/ Trainwreck, white trash, freak, maniac, psycho
I'm a troublemaking rebel / Made a deal with the devil / I'm way past ever coming back

I'm not anybody / Don't you cry for me / I'm just from a dysfunctional family


preZvezda - Life

Пятница, 20 Февраля 2009 г. 08:20 + в цитатник
I don't understand the meaning of Life anymore.... what is it? Live = exist? I don't think so... Now everything's mixed again, i can't feel anything... I know there're people who takes care of me, they r always there... But i feel alone anyway... It's strange. Just a word could change everything in my "life". But the words r unspoken now...
I remember those sad days... When i was 15, i think the whole thing was around 2004-2005... Unhappy, very sad, alone... Without name, without friends, without love... And when you find somebody, and you trust, and you show your feelings.. It's hard to find out everything was in vain... Or maybe, you dont deserve happyness at all... I dunno what to feel right now... Like i told, i'm just mixed up... Of course, i can't talk 2 my friends, i know them.. "U r a stupid, u have to leave her" I can't do that. So dont start with it... My whole life waiting and now ive got to leave her? I won't. I can't. I won't. Never. The truth is that... Sometimes i feel like maybe i got used to be sad, be all the time wondering who i am, why i am here.. I dunno, maybe i just got used to. So now i can't live without sadness... But this is real, i can't be happy anymore! I can't just get over it, is not soooo easy like soooo much ppl thinks... It's not easy, is not fast, is not what i want...
She gave me a link to see an anime, i'm watching. But i stoped just a while, to listen 2 a song... When i'm sad, sad songs get it worst.. But i do it, duno why... Cinema Bizarre - It's Over. I think i can continue with my book right now, i'm sad so.. It's for my book. Maybe if there're some ""lonely"" ppl, they wanna know more about my book... I'm writing 2 books, one of them is about a murder. The second, the newest, is a kind of diary, "Zvezda" is about my life, my feelings... All this crazy things runing through my head when i'm this way... Of course i will post it here.
I had posted soo many for Yulia in this her B-Day... HAPPY BIRTHDAY YULIAA!!! I'm really happy for her, and the picture posted on is just perfect. Perfect eyes, perfect look, perfect short hair, perfect lips... She's just P.E.R.F.E.C.T And i miss her, i want her come back... Not to stage, to my city. See her again. I wanna talk to her again, get more autographs... I miss her :(
Tomorrow maybe, i will upload the screens of the places i was posting my wishes 4 my little Volchitsa...
A little news:: I DO NOT use my MAIL.RU account anymore.

Be happy. I know u can be.


p.s.= This a little experience... I did it again, is the 3rd time:


#35 on TopList

Среда, 18 Февраля 2009 г. 07:35 + в цитатник
Listening to LoveSongs, nothing new here... The Whole day i was making my video-gift for Yulia's B-Day! I think it's cute. New deadline was posted @ the forum and i was like wtf!?!?!? So, i runed! And now the video is available on YouTube, so i really hope people like it and choose it to put in the B-Day page. I never before have done something like this, but this is MY YEAR! I'm pretty sure, i will go so far!! And u guys will help me to reach my dreams. Like today, in my Blog, on BlogSpot, i had 5 visits so i'm in the #35 place!!! I'm really happy about that... And i have a good news too!! Today i have received an e-mail from the TATU HITS Admin, so i'm in the Team now! And it makes me happy too!!

This is the screen to remember my #35 place, BlogSpot. TopList
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My words for Yulia, in my video are:
"Your birthday only comes around once a year so let's make today a day to remember!!! :) Wishing you a Happy Birthday and many more to come, good health and happiness in life. I hope all your birthday dreams and wishes come true :) May your days be filled with sunshine & beautiful colors. And may ur nights be filled with dreams & wishes 2 come. Me and all ur fans all around the world r hoping that 4 every candle on your cake u get a wonderful surprise!!!"

Of course, words writen from the bottom of my heart, i really love her. But i love my girlfriend too :) Simply i found out last night my girlfriend really loves me... And takes care of me... I just love her. I'm so lucky to have her in my life!


Tell Me Why - PromoVideo

Вторник, 17 Февраля 2009 г. 07:53 + в цитатник
I think it's not so necessary put it here... It's pretty obvious I LOVE CB but i wanna have it here too... I have my CB Player in my blog, (¯`·._.·[ Show Me Love ]·._.·´¯) on but i don't know why i can't put it here... Well, that's not importat, i have the full mp3 XD
And i wanna left my PromoVideo for "Tell Me Why" too, Просмотров: 147!!!!!!! omg...
You can watch it @ It's so crazy so many peolpe saw it... I really didn't expected something like that. It makes me really happy. Soon i will make more.


t.A.T.u. - Rock in TV Iterview

Понедельник, 16 Февраля 2009 г. 22:24 + в цитатник
Well, let's try something... I really wanna start this diary with a gift... It's not HQ, but is a nice video... Like u already know, i have uploaded this interview on YouTube, and now i bring u the DOWNLOAD LINK. I really hope u enjoy it.. It's so beautiful and funny.

WATCH: Part 1 -

WATCH: Part 2 -

WATCH: Part 3 -



Let's try to start... Back to zero.

Понедельник, 16 Февраля 2009 г. 15:19 + в цитатник
Few days ago i began listen 2 Cinema Bizarre. OMG! Such a style! Strify! Image and video hosting by TinyPic I already knew about them, they appeared in a magazine that I bought, when i was TH fan... But, it's history now. Obviously, I love t.A.T.u. much more, as you already know, since 2002. Today was a happy day... Downloading HQ's, i can't complain at all. The truth is that a long time ago i dreamt of this moment, the contacts are simply fabulous! But i'm not a material person, i really believe in friendship. They are my friends too.
FAN ART & TEBYA_SKUCHAYU ACTIV: Well, not so much to say... I'm workin in some demos but now i'm voiceless so... I can't continue. Good news guys! I got the 9 part of Ne Zhaley, so i'll be there soon. And my fanart? Nothing special, i'm writing my book...
My little brother is crazy, now we r singing Nas Ne Dogonyat together! Here it's 10 in the morning, & i'm going 2 sleep. I should wake up early 2 speak with Wessam, so...

be happy, Ira.



Суббота, 31 Мая 2008 г. 02:44 + в цитатник
ALL THREADS DELETED. I'll come back soon!

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