Cat has some Java code which handles text layout. Now, someone writing the code didn't understand the idea of enumerated types, so every constant is a string.

That's a nuisance, but not a terrible problem. Of course, with Java's String handling, you also run into the fact that == will frequently work, because Java tries to reuse String instances, but it won't always work, and thus equals exists.

So this code didn't actually work:

if (alignment == LEFT_ALIGN) {
        return RIGHT_ALIGN;
} else if (alignment == RIGHT_ALIGN) {
        return LEFT_ALIGN;
} else {
        return CENTER_ALIGN;
}

But even if it did, the only thing I can think when I look at this code is: "No, your other left!"

https://thedailywtf.com/articles/constantly-sinister