I was watching The Players at Sawgrass and there was a young man interviewed who is reputed to be a fantastic ball striker. He was on the leader board for the first time in his pro career. Here's what he said (roughly).
"Because I was such a good ball striker I thought I would come out here (the tour) and win a bunch of tournaments. I was in for a rude awakening and didn't win a thing. My short game, Chipping, wedges, bunkers and putting just wasn't good enough. I was amazed at how good these guys are. I started working really hard on all aspects of my short game, especially chipping and putting and that was two years ago. I feel I am just starting to catch up now."
Two years!!! This is the reality. Improvement is ongoing, takes time and must be enjoyable in and of itself. It's a journey that must be fun, see how good you can get, work to a plan and do it consistently.
There is just far too much impatience in training with players expecting to get results quickly, in weeks and months, instead of months and years like the pro's. (who also work many more hours than you can budget to your improvement as they are "practicing their job") The problem with unrealistic time scales on improvement is that it invariably leads to disappointment when the desired improvement is not met in short time. This then causes despondency and a lack of belief in any number of things like. I'm not good enough, I lack the talent to do this. The things I am doing don't work for me, or THE COACH IS CRAP - it's not my fault.
Maybe you don't have the talent to do something - Then get a coach who will be honest with you while still respecting your dreams and the ability of humans to achieve something against the odds. I HATE telling anyone they can't achieve something, absolutely loath it as I am a believer that talent is the lesser part of achievement when a person has desire and determination.
Desire and determination will beat talent into second place virtually every time. But if you said you were a 20 handicapper and you wanted to win the masters next year, I would probably get off the fence and make some sort of diplomatic caution. Generally though, it's not normally a lack of talent, it's a lack of belief and a realistic time frame to achieve it.
Maybe the things you are doing don't work for you. The chances are that they will work given time and the discipline in implementation. However, if you give a method a realistic run and it doesn't work, you don't give up. You change. Try a different method and you keep searching until you succeed.
A good coach will work with you on changing if he/she feels you have given it a good try and the results are not happening. Remember that failure is good only if you keep trying until you succeed. Failure is an indication that something you are doing is wrong, nothing more, so change what you're doing.
"The coach is crap, it's not my fault!" It is the easiest thing in the world to blame the person teaching you. We all know this but it is extremely unhelpful to what you are trying to achieve. You need to be very honest with yourself. Are you really doing everything they ask you to practice and the amount of time they advise? Do you get off track and change things on your own? If you think your coach is crap then go see someone else.
Your coach needs to have your best interests at heart and really CARE about you as a person and a golfer. A coach is a guide, you have to do the work. Learning is your responsibility, it is not the coaches responsibility to teach you. The coach has a responsibility to part information to you to the very best of their ability and in a manner that is personalized to you and you can understand. The coach has a responsibility to constantly be learning themselves. If your coach only reads one or two books a year (or worse, NONE!!!) and hardly ever goes on a course - RUN A MILE!
Just in case you are still struggling with the concept that learning is your responsibility and not the coaches, let me put it this way to try and give you my belief of the coach/client relationship. The coach can lead you to water, but cannot force you to drink. A good coach will notice how you drink and change the water when necessary to better suit the individual until they are drinking contentedly. A good coach will change to suit you, BUT, you still have to drink.
Is your coach capable of playing the shots you want to learn? If they are and they can explain mechanics, equipment and thinking then that's fine. If they can't play the shot ten times out of ten perfectly and you want them to, then perhaps you should ask them to learn less and practice more? Would that help you? In other words don't expect them to play like tour players if their focus is on coaching (where it should be) and not playing. I know plenty of great golfers who couldn't teach a dog to beg for a juicy bone!
Lastly, find a coach who doesn't mind if you become a better golfer than them. The mark of a good coach is when the client can teach the coach. It's difficult for coaches sometimes - as ego gets in the way - but the bottom line is that a coach should be more interested in learning how to coach than mastering the game itself and showing everyone how good THEY ARE. Frankly I don't give a damn how good my coach is at getting up and down and shooting low numbers. I want him/her to show me how to achieve it, if I put in the hard work needed. I want the coach to LEARN MORE so they have a broader knowledge and can teach me more! I know that is greedy but that's what I expect from a coach. I want information and I'm not interested in their ego.
Choose a coach carefully and be realistic about change/improvement. Go on a permanent journey of improvement to see how good you can get and take responsibility for your own learning. Your coach should be a knowledgeable guide who cares about you as a person first, then a golfer. Drink deep and enjoy!