total depression - this is my life for a much last months..
i seem to be sometimes happy, sometimes sad, but nevertheless, global depression slows my life, concentrate it to a one point of something disgusting or boring but anyway just bad.
unpresence of motivation - this is what i have, this is what i am, this is my illness. this illness is much more dangerous than AIDS or cancer.
there is no reason to live anymore for me. and it's too lazy for me to imagine some new goal or dream and to start trying to reach it.
and it is the worst situation i could imagine now.
it could be your worst nightmare - a man who hasn't any motivation in his life.
but...
no.
stop.
im too tired.
i'm too tired of being drunk half of my free time, i'm too tired of playing online game to runaway from this boring world...
i'm tired of boredom. i'm tired of being loki.
hello, world!
my name is shakti.
arseniy shakti andersson.
i want to start new life. i want to earn a lot of money to make or buy everything i wanted before but couldn't make or buy because of being too lazy. i want to find a really beautiful and kind girl (yes, like daria), differing to ugly monsters like diexa who will only continue to play her dolls.
yep, dasha makes me suffering, but anyway she's right. if i want any new bright and beautiful life - i need to get my ass up first. and to start doing anything.
yes, i had chosen a new name... and new ideals are coming soon.
so now... work, work and one more time work. it will be my first priority first two months. i will be free from the univercity soon, but it wouldn't be easy to return there in january - i'd already asked about it. so if i want to buy expensive things - i should do something for it first.
i'm too tired of siting on the seaside and waiting good weather.
i'm lucky but i'm still not succesful. how do u think, why?
i kill my lazy nature.
it's time to change.

and as for daria.. hate u bitch. i think u could decide why.
but.. when i'll be drunk.. i'll luv u again.. like i'd promised.