Lilit_333
, 19 2011 . 20:37 ()
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Officer: So, fake U.S. Marshall. Fake credit cards. You got anything that's real?
Dean: My boobs.
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Policeman: I'm not sure you realize just how much trouble you're in here.
Dean: We talking, like, misdemeanor kind of trouble? Or, uh... "squeal like a pig" kind of trouble?
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Dean: House rules, Sammy. Driver picks the music; shotgun shuts his cake hole.
Sam: You know, Sammy is a chubby twelve-year-old. It's Sam, okay?
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Sam: Hey, Dean. What I said earlier, about Mom and Dad, I'm sorry.
Dean: [holds up hand to stop Sam] No chick flick moments.
Sam: Alright jerk.
Dean: Bitch.
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Sam: When I told Dad I was scared of the thing in my closet, he gave me a .45.
Dean: Well, what was he supposed to do?
Sam: I was nine years old. He was supposed to say, "Don't be afraid of the dark."
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Dean: You know I gotta say I'm sorry I'm gonna miss it.
Sam: Miss what?
Dean: How many chances am I gonna have to see my own funeral?
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Sam: Nah, it's ok. You know, the truth is even at Stanford, deep down I never really fit in.
Dean: Well that's 'cause you're a freak.
Sam: Yeah, thanks.
Dean: Well, I'm a freak too. I'm right there with you... All the way.
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Larry: Let me just say. We accept home owners of any race, religion, color or... sexual orientation.
Dean: We're brothers.
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Sam: Dean, Ive been thinking.
Dean: Well, thats never a good thing.
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Deputy Kathleen: (about Sam) Does your cousin have a drinking problem?
Dean: What, Sam? Two beers and he's doin' karaoke.
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Dean: Demons I get. People are crazy.
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Dean: I thought the legend said that Mordecai only goes after chicks. Alright, well I mean that explains why it went after you, but why me?
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Dean: People believe in Santa Claus - why aren't I getting hooked up every Christmas?
Sam: 'Cause you're a bad person.
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Dean: Where's our father, Meg?
Meg: You didn't ask very nice.
Dean: Where's our father, bitch?
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John: Here. (hands Sam a card) Give them my insurance.
Sam: (sceptically) Elroy McGillicuddy?
John: And his two loving sons.
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Dean: Come on, Dad. You've got to help me. I've got to get better, I've got to get back in there. You haven't called a soul for help, you haven't even tried. Aren't you going to do anything, aren't you even going to say anything?! I've done everything you've ever asked me, everything. I've given everything I've ever had. Now you're just going to sit there and watch me die? What the hell kind of father are you?!
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Dean: You know what, youre right. Come here. Im gonna lay my head gently on your shoulder. Maybe we can cry, hug - maybe even slow dance.
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[Dean is overjoyed to have his Impala back]
Sam: Look, if you two need time alone, just say so.
Dean: [to the Impala] Don't listen to him, baby. He doesn't understand us.
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Sam: Dean, get me a bucket.
Dean: Find something?
Sam: No, I think I'm going to puke
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Dean: Youre good. A monster pain in the assbut youre good.
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Dean: What's dead should stay dead.
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Dean: You and dad Youre the most important people in my life. And nowI never shouldve come back, Sam. It wasnt natural.
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Neil: You're crazy.
Dean: Your girlfriend's past her expiration date and we're crazy?
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Sam: Our lives are weird, man.
Dean: You're telling me. Come on.
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Dean: We can't just waste 'em with a headshot?
Sam: Dude, you've been watching way too many Romero flicks.
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Sam: So, Im a freak now?
Dean: Youve always been a freak.
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Sam: Dean, you should stay back.
Dean: No argument here. Ive had my head screwed with enough for one day.
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Sam: So, is this as glamorous as you thought it would be?
Jo: Except for all the pee-your-pants scares, yeah.
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Man: Say, why dont you get out of the car and well talk a little.
Dean: Well, you are a handsome devil, but I don't swing that way, sorry.
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Sergeant: What's going on with everybody?
Dean: I don't know.
Sergeant: My neighbor Mr. Rodgers, h-
Dean: You've got a neighbor named Mr. Rodgers?
Sergeant: Not anymore.
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Sam: This is the dumbest thing you've ever done.
Dean: I don't know about that. Remember that waitress in Tampa? (shudders)
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Dean: Come on man. I know Sam, ok? Better than anyone. He's got more of a conscience than i do. I mean the guy feels guilty searching the internet for porn.
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Susan: Let me guess. You guys are here antiquing?
Dean: How'd you know?
Susan: Oh, you just look the type. So, uh, a king-size bed?
Sam: What?! No, uh no, we're Two singles. We're just brothers.
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Susan: What the hell happened out there?
Dean: You want the truth?
Susan: Of course.
Dean: Well at first we thought it was some kind of hoodoo curse. But that out there, was definitely a spirit.
Susan: You're insane.
Dean: That's been said.
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Dean: Frigging cops.
Sam: They're just doing their job.
Dean: No, they're doing our job. Only they don't know it, so they suck at it.
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Sam: Dude, all right, I'll admit, we've gone pretty ghetto with spellwork before, but this takes the cake! I mean, a Spongebob placemat instead of an altar cloth?!
Dean: We'll just put it Spongebob-side down.
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Sam: It appeared before me and I just... this feeling washed over me. Like peace. Like grace.
Dean: Okay, ecstasy boy. Maybe well get you some glow sticks and a nice Dr. Seuss hat.
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Sam: What?
Dean: Nothing.
Sam: Dean! What!?
Dean: Dude, you full on had a girl up inside of you for like a week.
Dean: That's pretty naughty.
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Dean: Whats going on with you, Sam? Hm? Cause smoking, throwing bottles at people - that sounds more like me than you.
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Trickster: Mr. Morality here, he brought a lot of girls up here. Got more ass than a toilet seat.
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Molly: Oh, thank God!
Dean: Call me Dean.
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Officer: You think your funny.
Dean: I think I'm adorable.
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Bobby: So, we're eating bacon cheeseburgers for breakfast, are we?
Dean: Well, sold my soul. Got a year to live. I ain't sweatin' the cholesterol.
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Dean: I'm amazing I'm Batman!
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Sam: No way. That's my Division Championship soccer trophy! I can't believe he kept this.
Dean: Yeah, it's probably the closest you ever came to being a boy.
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Sam: I think it's Snow White.
Dean: Snow White? Ah, I saw that movie. Oh, porn version anyway. That wicked Stepmother (hoots) she was wicked.
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Sam: You remember Cinderella? The pumpkin that turns into a coach and the mice that become horses?
Dean: Dude! Could you be more gay? Don't answer that.
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Sam: Look, Dean. If you wanna have Christmas, knock yourself out. Just don't involve me.
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Dean: What are you talking about? We had some great Christmases.
Sam: Whose childhood are you talking about?
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Dean: Aah! You bitch!
Madge: Oh, my goodness me! Somebody owes a nickel to the swear jar. Oh, do you know what I say when I feel like swearing? Fudge.
Dean: I'll try and remember that.
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Ruby: That's what Hell is. Forgetting who you are.
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Dean: I hate witches. They're always spewing their bodily fluids everywhere
Sam: Pretty much.
Dean: It's creepy, y'know, it's downright unsanitary!
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Dean: Sammy wherever you are, Mom is a babe. I'm going to Hell. Again.
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Dean: What are you allergic to straight answers you son of a bitch?!
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Dean: And I have every reason in the world to believe that.
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Dean: We still got to see the new "raiders" movie.
Sam: Saw it.
Dean: Without me?
Sam: You were in hell.
Dean: That's no excuse!
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Wesley: Aren't you the guys from the Health Department?
Sam: Yeah. And florists on the side.
Dean: Plus FBI. And on Thursdays, we're teddy bear doctors.
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Dean: I'm sitting in a laundromat, reading about myself sitting in a laundromat, reading about myself. My head hurts.
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Dean: "Sam turned his back on Dean, his face brooding and pensive." I mean, I don't know how he's doing it, but this guy is doing it. I can't see your face, but those are definitely your brooding and pensive shoulders.
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Sam: Want some aspirin?
Dean: No thanx House.
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Dean: Oh, you know, I thought you were supposed to be impressive. All you do is black out the room?
Raphael: And the eastern seaboard.
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Castiel: Except I used to belong to a much better club. And now I'm powerless. I'm hapless, I'm hopeless, I mean, why the hell not bury myself in women and decadence? Right? It's the end, baby! That's what decadence is for. Why not bang a few gongs before the lights go out?
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2014-Chuck: So you're really from '09?
Dean: Yeah, 'fraid so.
2014-Chuck: Some free advice? You ever get bac
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Dean: What are you, stoned?
2014-Castiel: Generally, yeah.
Dean: What happened to you?
2014-Castiel: [shrugs] Life.
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Dean: A bloody, violent monster and you wanna be Facebook friends with him?
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Dean: You're my shrink? Well, lucky me.
Dr. Cartwright: And you're my paranoid schizophrenic with narcissistic personality disorder and religious psychosis. Lucky me.
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Dean: Youre a zombie.
Clay: Im a taxpayer.
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Dean: I'm dead.
Castiel: My condolences.
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Sam: Are you drunk?
Castiel: No! [brief pause] Yes.
Sam: what happened?
Castiel: I found a liquor store.
Sam: And?
Castiel: And I drank it.
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Sam: [To Dean] No drinking, no gambling, no premarital sex. Dean, they basically just outlawed 90 percent of your personality.
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Dean: What is that?
Bobby: That's the round I mean to put through my skull. Every morning, I look at it. I think, "Maybe today is the day I'll flip the lights out." But I don't do it. I never do it. You know why? Because I promised you I wouldn't give up!
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Dean: Screw destiny right in the face. I say we take the fight to them, do it our way.
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Dean: Cas, not for nothing, but the last person who looked at me like that I got laid.
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Sam: What the hell happened to him?
Castiel: [Carrying bloodied, unconscious Dean] Me.
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Crowley: Go get him tiger.
Dean: Wait, you're not coming?
Crowley: No, there's demons up there. It's not safe.
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Lisa: The guy that basically just saved the world shows up at your door, you expect him to have a couple of issues.
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Dean: His name is Misha! Misha?! Misha? Jensen? What's with names around here?
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Sam: I'm just saying we landed in some dimension where you're Jensen Ackles, and I'm something called a Jared Padalecki.
Dean: So what, now you're Polish?!
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Sam: All right, who puts a 300-gallon aquarium in their trailer?
Dean: Apparently Jensen Ackles.
Sam: (rolling his eyes) Huh.
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: P.diddy.
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Lilit_333
, 19 2011 . 20:37 ()
