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Season 4, Episode 16 - My Quarantine
February 8, 2005
J.D. is excited about his first date with Kylie (Chrystee Pharris). On the way to dinner, J.D. runs over a possum, which dies, and a homeless man's hand. They end up taking Steve the homeless guy to the hospital. J.D. gets a surprise when Danni (Tara Reid) shows up. He hasn't seen her since their last break-up and J.D. doesn't want Kylie to be exposed to Danni's toxicity. J.D. is handed the chart of a patient who may have SARS-related symptoms. Suddenly, the hospital has to be shut down for quarantine while they investigate his condition. It's policy that the hospital be locked down until the labs confirm that it is or isn't SARS.

Since she's stuck with J.D., Kylie mentions off hand that she wishes she could be his assistant. J.D. makes Lonnie take off his shirt so that Kylie can wear it. Everyone else tries to find something to do. Carla has Turk changes the dressings on a patient since there's no surgery for him to do. Cox tries to avoid Danni. Dr. Kelso bets the Janitor that he can't catapult a cotton ball into a container with a tongue depressor. The Janitor misses on the first try, so Kelso tells him double or nothing. He keeps missing, racking up a total of $600. The final total reaches $700, none of which the Janitor has. Dr. Kelso tells him that if he gets him a piece of Nurse Laverne Roberts' (Aloma Wright) face cake, he'll forgive the debt. When Nurse Roberts notices a piece missing, Dr. Kelso points to Janitor.

Still bored, J.D. has Steve the homeless guy pretend to have a heart attack so J.D. can go through the motions of trying to save him so Kylie will think he's a great doctor. J.D. originally gave him $20, but Steve demands $50 to make it look good. He feels guilty about lying to Kylie since her last boyfriend lied to her, but he gets over it. Turk gets upset when he finds out that Carla and Dr. Cox dated briefly.

Finally, they get the OK that the patient doesn't have SARS. Dr. Kelso is just about to leave the hospital when Laverne grabs his hand. She spotted some icing on his thumb, icing from her face cake. She tastes it and confirms that it is indeed her icing. Janitor ratted Kelso out. The Janitor tries for one more shot, double or nothing. It goes in!

J.D. finally admits to Kylie that he's been lying to her. She takes it in stride and they end the evening with a kiss.