Twas the night before X-mas

And all through the omniverse

All the Santas were busy

Readying presents to disperse

Since its such a large space

They came up with a scheme

Massive helpers to keep up the gift-giving pace

What a festive theme!

And so in this universe

A young woman was selected

Mirei Shikishima, all ready to give and traverse

To bring amazing presents to all nice persons affected

Mirei was grown, quite massive in size

Why, planets were barely visible in her sight!

After all, through her gorgeous crimson eyes

It would be quite difficult to find the Earth from her height

The poor woman, trying to bring X-mas cheer

Is unaware of the problem as she rests

For at this very moment, as her eyes scan near

The Earth somehow has been lodged in her breasts!

Oh Mirei, how you must feel

Your bag filled with presents, heavy indeed

Knowing not where your target is

Your duty in jeopardy, how will you succeed?

If you do not receive presents this eve

Fear not, just hear my words in their stead

For the best gift of all one can conceive

Is that every male on Earth presently has a nosebleed

Thus my rushed poem endeavor

Of the massive Mirei doth come to an end

So I hope you enjoyed it and found it somewhat clever

And with that, I say, Merry X-mas, my friends!

I thought Id mitigate the terribleness of my yearly X-mas card with this lame poem I thought up on a whim, though I doubt anyonell read it (I also sucked at poetry in high school, but I at least managed to do a consistent 2-4 rhyming scheme here! [Prose was always much more my forte XD]). Anyways, I literally did this all in the last few hours due to busyness and stuff, so my apologies for the lame quality. Still, its been a yearly tradition of mine to make these things, so I couldnt forget to do it (Also, I just noticed for the past several years I've apparently done the whole "Earth + boobs" gag, which I was unaware of when I was making this, so I'll make sure to do something else next year).

Anyways, as the poem says, Mirei has attempted to bring presents to the Earth, but has, well, lost it and cant seem to find it. Oh well, at least itll be quite the warm holiday for all as of now. Regardless of how the weather treats us, to everyone viewing this, friends especially...

Merry X-mas everyone!

DISCLAIMER: I do not own nor claim to own any of the images used above. I do not own Valkyrie Drive Mermaid nor any of its characters and likenesses. All collage materials are copyright of their respective artists/owners.

Image Used: tinyurl.com/gud5kd4