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Создан: 31.07.2006
Написано: 151

Temptation is fun…giving in is better


Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 17:08 + в цитатник
Some time ago a
mother punished her 5-year-old daughter for wasting a roll of expensive wrapping paper. Money was tight and she became even more upset when the child used the gold paper to decorate a box to put under the Christmas
tree. Nevertheless, the little girl brou ght the gift box to her mother the next morning and said, "This is for you, Mamma." The mother was embarrassed by her earlier over reaction, but her anger flared again when she opened the box and found it was empty. She spoke to her daughter in
a harsh manner. "Don't you know, young lady, when you give someone a present there's supposed to be something inside! The package?" She had tears in her eyes And said, "Oh, Mamma, it's not empty! I blew kisses into it until it was full." The mother was crushed. She fell on her knees and
put her arms around her little girl, and she begged her forgiveness for her thoughtless anger.An accident took the life of the child only a short time later, and it is told that the mother kept that gold box by her bed for all the years of her life. Whenever she was discouraged or faced difficult problems she would open the box and take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there.

In a very real sense, each of us, as human beings, have been given a Golden box filled with unconditional love and kisses from our Children, family, friends and God. There is no more precious possession anyone could hold.

just ..

Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 16:55 + в цитатник
stress out..
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You have just been hugged!

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The hug is my favorite sign of affection.

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It can mean so much, and many things at the same time.

It can be a sign of love, friendship, support, caring, comfort or anything.
So here you go. All I can say it will do is brighten someone's day.
I mean, we all need a hug once in a while.
Goodness knows, we could all REALLY use a hug sometimes.

Soooo Enjoy your hug. Thanks.

God Bless you, your family, & your friends!

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Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 16:49 + в цитатник

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Dear All:

Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 16:48 + в цитатник
This photo is a very rare one, taken by NASA. This kind of event occurs once in 3000 years.
This is a picture NASA took with the Hubbell telescope.
Called "The Eye of God."

Don't talk to my Parrot!

Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 16:34 + в цитатник
Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman.. Since she
had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, "I'll leave the
key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll
mail you a check."

"Oh, by the way don't worry about my bulldog Spike. He won't bother
you. But, whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot!"

When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he
discovered the biggest, meanest looking bulldog he has ever seen. But,

just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the
go about his work.

The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant
yelling, cursing and name calling. Finally the repairman couldn't
contain himself any longer and yelled,

"Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!"

To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!"

See.............Men just don't listen ! :-)

Why, Why, Why

Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 16:30 + в цитатник
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are
getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there
not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars,
but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his ch est, but ducks when you throw
a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "Lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are
always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that
something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their
vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to
give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling
off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer
when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is
suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best
friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.


Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 16:21 + в цитатник
ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it.

FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.

SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.


Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 16:15 + в цитатник
A redneck family from the hills was visiting the city and they went to a mall for the first time in their lives. The father and son were strolling around while the
wife shopped. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked, "Paw, what's at?"

The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, "Son, I dunno. I ain't never seen anything like that in my entire life, I ain't got no idea'r what it is."

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls
opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular number above the walls
light up sequentially.

They continued to watch until it reached the last n umber and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. The the walls opened up again and a
gorgeous, voluptuous 24 year-old blonde woman stepped out.

The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son, "Boy.......go gitcha momma........

to Jerusalem

Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 16:13 + в цитатник
A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land, for $150." The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.

The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $150?"
The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance."

Golf round

Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 16:10 + в цитатник
A man was at the country club for his weekly round of golf. He began his round with an eagle on the first hole and a birdie the second. On the third hole he had just scored his first ever hole in one when his cell phone rang.

It was a doctor notifying him that his wife had just been in a terrible accident and was in critical condition and in the ICU.

The man told the doctor to inform his wife where he was and that the he'd be there as soon as possible. As he hung up he realized he was leaving what was shaping up to be his best ever round of golf. He decided to get in a couple of more holes before heading to the hospital. He ended up finishing all eighteen. He finished his round shooting a personal best 61 shattering the club record by five strokes and beating his previous best game by more than 10 shots.

He was jubilant, then he remembered his wife. Feeling guilty he dashed to the hospital. He saw the doctor in the corridor and asked about his wife's condition.

The doctor glared at him and shouted, "You went ahead and finished your round of golf didn't you! I hope your proud of yourself! While you were out for the past four hours enjoying yourself at the country club your wife has been languishing in the ICU! It's just as well you went ahead and finished that round because it will be more than likely your last! For the rest of her life she will require 'round the clock care. And you'll be her care giver!"

The man was feeling so guilty he broke down and sobbed.

The doctor started to snicker and said, "Just kidding! She died more than two hours ago. What'd you shoot?"

Oriental Eye Exam

Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 05:38 + в цитатник
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If you cannot decipher anything,

try pulling the corners of your eyes

as if you were Chinese!


Love story in 4 pitures

Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 04:15 + в цитатник
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Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 03:56 + в цитатник
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God Saw you hungry & created McDonalds, Wendys, and Dairy Queen.

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He saw you thirsty & created Coke, Pepsi, Juice, Coffee and Water.

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GOD saw you in the dark & created Light.

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GOD saw you without a Good looking , adorable,
Friend........ so He created M E .

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Walk this day in peace and in the warmth of the SON.

ghetto flat screen

Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 03:42 + в цитатник
Make sure you see both pitures..
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Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 03:22 + в цитатник
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cute one..

Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 03:18 + в цитатник
A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is Politics?"

Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way:

I am the head of the family, so call me The President.

Your mother is the administrator of the money, so we call her the

We are here to take care of your needs, so we will call you the People.

The nanny, we will consider her the Working Class.

And your baby brother, we will call him the Future.

Now think about that and see if it makes sense."

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said.

Later that night,! he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him.

He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper.

So the little boy goes to his parent's room and finds his mother asleep.
Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and see s his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.

The next morning, the little boy say's to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now. "

The father says, "Good, son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about."

The little boy replies, "The President is screwing the Working Class while the Government is sound asleep. The People are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit."

Why Men Have Better Friends

Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 03:15 + в цитатник
Friendship between Women:

A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she told her husband
that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's
10 best friends. None of them knew about it.

Friendship between Men:

A man didn't come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he
had slept over at a friend's house. The woman called her husband's 10
best friends. Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two
claimed that he was still there.


Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 03:08 + в цитатник
1. To Grow Up
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2. To Fill Out

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3. To Slim Down

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4. To Hold It In

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5. To Hell with

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Среда, 24 Января 2007 г. 01:58 + в цитатник
Why God made flowers? To remind us of the beauty of woman!
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Good wife

Вторник, 23 Января 2007 г. 21:54 + в цитатник
What about good wife? So..
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